(1) A bicycle can't stand on its own because it is two-tired."Tearable puns" is itself a terrible pun. Click to enlarge the illustration so you can read the fine print. Do any of these tickle your funny bone? I kind of like "poultry in motion."
(2) Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.
(3) When a clock is hungry, it goes back four seconds.
(4) The short fortuneteller who escaped from prison was a small medium at large.